A child’s perspective on learning to look straight ahead — I am five years old and walking with my mother. We are on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, where we live in a boxy apartment in a building so big that there are two distinct sides, each with its own lobby and set of buzzers. I live on the…

I carry the weight of the secrets kept from me — Having recently unearthed two massive, life-changing secrets that directly impacted me, I spend a great deal of time contemplating the life I lived before I knew versus the life I live now, after. For every step forward, I take a half-step back. We can never go back to exactly where…

One Small Moment at a Time — My daughter drops off a box for me late at night when she should be asleep. Inside is a Ziploc bag of kale and another Ziploc filled with delicate Concord grapes. “Eat the grapes,” she says. “I’ve had too many, I’m graped out. But you’ll love them.” I don’t have…

My one-woman study — After separating from my husband four years ago, I was certain that my nearly two decades of being a stay-home mom would prove to be my downfall. …

Is it possible to quantify how we are faring in our recoveries? — I’ve been separated from my husband for over four years and divorce papers have been filed. I’ve moved on in many ways: in a new relationship, new home, new career, and many new friends. I’ve thrown myself into this next chapter with gusto and by several measures, with success— a…

Overcoming shame and guilt to embrace sexuality in midlife — One of the biggest surprises to me in the annals of “I didn’t see that coming” is how fiercely I own and celebrate my sexuality in midlife. I am not alone. According to HealthDay News, women in midlife feel more confident and empowered when it comes to sex and thus…

In February 2018, when I debased myself by searching my husband’s phone to figure out why he had become cold and distant from me, I found myself smack in the center of a cliched midlife crisis story. I had, until that fateful night, led a fairly quiet albeit hectic life…

Grieving the past and future while trying to find peace in the present, midlife and after divorce — It is one thing to move out of a home you love, another thing entirely to watch a home gradually become not yours anymore. I know this because I’ve experienced both in the past year. My husband and I moved frequently in our twenty-seven years together, beginning with a tiny…

Is it fair that my ex-husband is allowed to move on in ways that I cannot? — My divorce papers have been signed and I’m mostly fine with them. The injustice of it all enraged and wounded me during the negotiations, but it’s done now and I feel free — not so much free from my ex-husband, as I already felt disconnected before the papers were signed…