I hear your POV. But if you believe you are in a partnership and you and your partner believe it is important that one of you stay home with the kids and one of you earns money, isn’t it reasonable to assume you are partners through and through? He didn’t become less of a father because he decided to exit the marriage, why should it only have been my role that was diminished in the marital break up? It never occurred to me that I was dependent on another person… I thought we were a team, for life. I was committed to that life and partnership. Many families make choices that they believe works best for their children. Not sure we should suffer the consequences when the decision to be a stay home mom was a joint decision, his decision to have an affair was his alone.