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Reflections on Identity
On Opening and Closing Doors
The threshold between the life you had and the life you could have
If marriage forms a union, then the ending of one constitutes a dissolution; we meld together to become one seemingly inseparable whole, then we are cleaved apart to become distinct entities again. Take two colors that are marbled together: it’s not so easy to simply extract one from the other — each is irrevocably altered, tinged with the other color, some swirls remaining intact while others blend together to create a third color, and then multiple gradients of that new color.
The marriage vows we take are morally and legally binding, but so are many contracts we sign and later contest in court. No matter how statutory and confined the jargon, there is still a degree to which a contract is subjective and thus open to a certain level of interpretation. I stated my vows at the age of twenty-five with solemnity and an objective of permanence, expecting that my husband was doing the same as he gazed into my eyes and made promises that, ultimately, he would not keep. Maybe I had broken promises too, but in intangible, subtle ways for which there was no hard evidence to prove the point.
Infidelity is the act of being unfaithful; being unfaithful is a treacherous act…
